I really need some help or some guidence. Please excuse my spelling its not always the best. I really need help and would appreciate your time if you stopped and help me. Okay I don%26#039;t realy know where to start but I have an older brother. For the past three years he has been a drug addict. It wasn%26#039;t bad the whole time though. It started out by him getting kicked out of the house by my parents. But came back about 6 months later becuase he had %26quot;changed%26quot;. He only lasted 3 or so months and would get kicked out again. And then he would come back because he wanted help. And later changed his mind to he doesn%26#039;t want help anymore so my parents kicked him out again. He was then living with one of his friends who sold and did drugs. A few weeks later he had a break down. He cried saying how he doesnt want his life to be like this anymore. My parents believed him, we all did. So my parents let him live back at home. He was going through bad withdrawls, so he would use drugs, then stop, then start using again. He would always fight with my parents he would push them and yell at them. He never once layer a hand on me. I am his little sister. I know he cared about he always told me and reminded me that he did. He was a great big brother deep down. One day while my brother, my mom, and me were home, he just blew up. He was so angry and scary. I was trying to talk to him to see what was wrong and to calm him down, but he pushed me hard. 聽So I pushed him off me. He reacted by punching me in the face. My mom called the cops and my brother left before they showed up. He was kicked out for good. My parents cleaned out his room that night and dropped it off at his friends house. A few weeks later I got my cell phone number changed. My friend sent me a text from my brother saying that he wishes for my to die. That one hit me hard. But he has been moved out into his own apartment. My parents still keep in touch with them. Just yesterday he called my dad at 2 in the morning because his car died. So my dad went down their to call and pay for a tow truck. I was furious. I don%26#039;t see why they treat him so nice? He has hurt the whole family. My mom used to have to go work with bruises on her arms. He has hurt mr and my whole family. He doesn%26#039;t deserve anything. It pisses me off that my parents do stuff like that for. They haven%26#039;t let go of him. And about 2 months ago my mom bought $100 worth of grocery for him. I kno he%26#039;s their son. But he has put us through hell.聽
Well lately have been feeling really unstabble. I%26#039;m a very happy girl. I enjoy life alot. I%26#039;m truely not sad. But I feel like I%26#039;m on pause and everyone around me is still going. I%26#039;m afraid to tell someone because I don%26#039;t want to sound crazy. I%26#039;m not sure if the unstabble thing has to do with what my brother has left on me but, it%26#039;s all I%26#039;ve been thinking about lately. I wish I could tell my mom but she usually just says well my brother has said the same things to them, which is true. I just still feel over whelmed for 16 year old. I already have so much on my mind. And this whole running through my mind doesn%26#039;t help. I%26#039;ve been abused, I%26#039;ve been wished to die, and I%26#039;m not okay with it. I just feel like theirs something mentally wrong with me. I just feel so over whelmed in life. Being 16 shouldn%26#039;t be like this. Please I%26#039;m sorry to use up your time anymore but I really need help. I%26#039;m not quite sure what%26#039;s going with me. I%26#039;ve already been to a counselor but I just feel like I will never be able to get over this. Please tell me your opinions on this, and something I should do or try. Thank you.|||wow reading your story is like a flashback for me. my brother was the same in some ways, putting us though so much stress everything became about him and his problems. its absolutely outrageous and i%26#039;m sorry that your parents don%26#039;t recognize what its doing to you. going to counseling didn%26#039;t really do anything for me either, i just ended up feeling overwhelmed and kept trying to figure things out on my own. i was lucky enough to make it through tho, until i was older and more independent. i stress, lucky! the best advice i can give ya is 2 not give up. maybe try going back 2 counseling . it couldn%26#039;t hurt could it maybe the therapist could even relate your situation to your parents. even if it doesnt change things right now it could help you get through to the next moment. keep trying to have things to look forward to and eventually things will be easier to handle.|||Hi! I%26#039;m really sorry for all this fiasco... I can understand that u love ur parents, that u don%26#039;t them to be hurt. But u got to understand that ur parents love your brother the same way as they love you. They still have a small hope that their son would change and come back to them and things would be the same as before...
Its in your brother%26#039;s hands to change everything. If he does not change then things would be the same or worse.
I can understand that you are stressed out because of this whole situation... but things will not change if you get depressed. You can too, change the scenerio of your house...
Just be happy... i know its difficult, but not impossible, right? Joke, laugh, tell stories to your parents and make them laugh too. I%26#039;m sure things will work out fine...
Best Wishes!|||My answer will be short, but to the point. Do NOT make HIS problems and choices turn into YOURS. His words and actions are not %26quot;real%26quot; because he is acting/reacting due to the chemicals in his body. You sound like a bright and intelligent person. You need to break the ties that you have emotionally and relationally with your brother until he can prove over time that he has changed. Your parents should do the same, but hey, YOU can only control what YOU do. People will do what they want when they want, so that%26#039;s why you need to figure out what makes you comfortable and able to live the happy life that you want. Maybe your parents will do the same, and maybe not, but that still doesn%26#039;t determine what you do. It is almost as if you have to have a %26quot;funeral%26quot; in your mind for the loss of your brother. For whatever mean things he has done, forgive him and continue on with the great things you want to accomplish in your life.
Best of luck to you...try to have a good day...a good week....and so on.|||even if your brother is (according to you) a jerk to your parents, it%26#039;s hard to not love your offspring, regardless of what he%26#039;s done. you probably already know that.
as far as how he has treated you, dont let that bring you down. drugs are a powerful thing. they can change the user completely to where you have no idea what to expect. they can go from incredibly calm and loving to violent in a heartbeat. its important not to take anything too personal.
my brother was an alcoholic. He was the sweetest man i ever knew. but when he was drunk, he was abusive.. deffensive, and intollerable. and i remember him always talking about quitting, and telling my mom that he was going to, but ever couple of nights.. he would come home worse than ever. he was also kicked out because he was such a pain..
i feel your pain.. its tough to know that someone you care about so much can hurt you so bad...
also, drug withdrawals are horrible. its a whole lot easier to grab a drug than it is to suffer. essentially, he is a prisoner. My brother was addicted to alcohol for the longest time, and even though he said he would stop.. and tried to stop, he couldn%26#039;t take the pain of withdrawals. in the end, he had to go to a rehab clinic, and get monitered in a detox program for 2 or 3 days.
i guess what im saying is that even though your brother wants to quit... and knows that his life would be better if he did, quitting an addiction is a medical ordeal that requires 24 hour monitoring.
i would suggest rehab
ps. stay happy. happiness is all we have in this world that makes life worth living.|||I know your young and it鈥檚 really hard to face this kind of situation especially in that age. But you are thinking negative which leads you to be affected by the things your brother said or done to you or to the whole family. Start from now to think positive which means think of all these issue as hit in your life that would make you a stronger person. In fact, it really does make you a stronger person the things you have faced in your young age. Put in mind darling that all the things your brother said or done was under drugs which means he doesn鈥檛 even notice them sometimes. He will never think, say, or do anything would hurt you if he was aware. From now on, whenever your brother comes to your mind, try to force yourself not to think of the bad history you and him have experienced and instead wish him a better future and think of how is he going to be like if he weren鈥檛 addicted.
Best of luck, and remember it鈥檚 all made you a stronger person who can face difficulties and it didn鈥檛 affect you.
